Dead End Drive

Dead End Drive is the first novel by American author, Ian Kirkpatrick. Agatha Jane Benedict, the heiress of the Benedict Estate, has died. Her adopted son, a fourteen-year-old illiterate brat called Kelly, expects to inherit her fortune.

The informal will reading, though, holds a surprise: "his inheritance to be left in the care of my personal medium and good friend, Madame Astra, until the boy is of legal age and able to claim it properly. If he and his guardian are unable to care for the property, the house rules will be applied and the individual who is able to care for it will receive it all."

Apparently, Agatha has been one of the more benevolent heirs to the Estate, "she felt charitable and wanted to offer someone down on their luck an opportunity to prosper, such as the tennis pro she never used. She wanted to give them the basics to help them up, then send them back into the world, but by the time their confidence was restored, they didn't want to leave the house."

Thus, apart from the tennis pro forced into retirement, there is a collection of freeloaders: a doctor with many malpractice suits; an ambitious personal stylist; a former cab-driver with a tendency to assault rides; and a gold-digger granddaughter. As well as this Agatha was making her way through a succession of lovers, all of whom she calls Beauregard, the name of her only husband.

"House rules"? It seems that the will-reading green-lights a murderous free-for-all, so that the recipients of her generosity embark on a killing spree to eliminate each other. Within an hour of the reading, one is already dead, and two more follow soon after. All this during a wild storm that has the lights flashing off and on again unpredictably.

What follows definitely has elements of slapstick, and there's quite a high body count. Meanwhile, loyal members of staff clean up the mess, dispose of the bodies, and try to protect Kelly.

This is a tale populated with violent characters; many are shallow, greedy and nasty; quite a few spout psychobabble, while some are given potted histories meant to legitimise their little philosophical discourses. Intended to entertain, but falls a little short. This unbiased review is from an uncorrected proof copy (that was liberally drenched in typographical and continuity errors) provided by NetGalley and Steak House Books.